How to Uncover the Root Cause of Your Stress – So You Can Live in Alignment with Your True Self
If you are not clear about exactly what is causing your stress, you can easily spend your time and energy trying to remedy the wrong thing.
Once you discover the source of your feelings of stress, you will be able to take effective action and move towards living in better alignment with your true self.
One of the first discussions I have with a new health coaching client is about her CORE VALUES.
Hearing her share her core values gives me a glimpse into who she truly is. I gain insight into what is most important to her, what motivates her to work towards her goals, how she makes decisions, where she finds her joy and hints of a roadmap that will guide her towards success.
How does a discussion about core values reveal so much?
Your core values are your way of being in the world. They provide the foundation for your choices, responses, reactions, and motivations.
Core values serve as your lighthouse, guardrail and roadmap in life.
When you honor these personal values, you experience fulfillment, vitality and alignment with your true self.
However, when you are live a life that is incongruent to your core values, feelings of stress and tension arise. You can spend your days feeling as though something is "off". You can start to attribute relationship conflicts to a flaw in the other person, or dissatisfaction at work can get pinned to a boss who micromanages you.
Your invitation in the face of stressful feelings, conflict and disconnection is to tune into your core values so that you can pinpoint the true cause.
Everyone’s core values are true to them. Comparably, everyone’s experience will be unique when these fundamental needs are not met.
For example, if FAMILY is one of your core values, but you have a job that requires you to work 70+ hours a week and you are not able to have the time and connection with your family that you enjoy, you will begin to experience feelings of stress, resentment, conflict and even fatigue because you are not "feeding" your FAMILY core value.
Or, if do not value competition yet you work in a competitive sales environment, you likely won't feel fulfilled in your job and your alignment will feel "off".
So...here is your invitation to tune into your CORE VALUES.
Make a list of your Top 5 Core Values. There are no right or wrong answers. This is what is true for you. And remember, this is not what you think you should value, but what you truly do value.
So, name them:
Once you have made your list, explore how these core values are active in your life right now. Notice any areas of your life where you currently feel stress, conflict or resentment. And tune into any connections between those feelings and the absence of expressing your core value there.
Once you have made those connections, you can begin to create a plan to reconnect to activities, choices and responses that will honor your personal values.
In doing my work as a health coach and yoga teacher, I find I am truly honoring my core values of wellness, connection and empathy.
The flexibility I have created in my schedule allows me to spend time every day with my family (another core value of mine), which feeds my soul.
By tuning into what matters most, you can reveal the root cause of stress and dissatisfaction in your life. And when you follow that up with a plan to honor your core values, you reveal your roadmap for happiness and fulfillment!
Cheri Timmons is a Greensboro Downtown Parks program partner. The work she does with us is critical to providing FREE wellness programming to our park community. As we make our way through these unprecedented times, consider how you might support local Greensboro non-profits like us, as well as local businesses, artists, entrepreneurs like Cheri, makers, and more. We'll continue to bring you free programming through our digital platforms and look forward to having you join us and Cheri back in the parks soon!